We're Sooo Back Baby!
Bitcoin smashes $100K (again) and we’re not surprised. We called it, nailed it, and now the bull market’s back - let’s keep it rolling.
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Howdy, Happy Hodlers!
You’re tuned into the Hodl Report, where the FUD is fading, the candles are climbing, and we’re legally required to say: we are so back! 🔥
This week on we’re looking at:
Market trends & vibes check 📈
Adoption updates & shiny new developments 🌍
Need-to-know news 📰
Memes to keep us emotionally diversified 😂
Let’s dive in!
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Another week, another milestone.
Bitcoin just smashed through the $100K barrier again, and suddenly the media tone flipped from “we’re all doomed” to “wow, this is actually great!” 🙃
But let’s be real, you already saw this coming if you've been reading us. We’ve been preaching patience, stacking sats, and dodging doomers for months now.
The vibes are BACK, baby - and you better believe we’re celebrating. 🎉 After surviving that dumpster fire of a market dip, we’ve earned this. Pour one out and enjoy it. 🍻
Now, we could start celebrating early, but let’s stay sharp. This pump may have arrived late to the usual 4-year cycle party, and that’s because the game has changed. TradFi suits, corporate whales, and even governments are now treating Bitcoin like the shiny new asset class on the block - their hedge against inflation and fiat nonsense.
Digital gold has arrived.
So what’s next after this run up to a new ATH?
Well… we’ll all find out together, but take some time to enjoy the ride. 🎢
How do we know the party isn’t over yet?
Smart answer?
Liquidity.
More dollars = more inflows = more candles. Rinse and repeat until the media starts breathlessly covering crypto again like it’s 2021. 🤑
Degenerate answer?
Trump.
The guy just dropped a new trade deal with the UK and followed it up with financial advice: “You better go out and buy stock now.”
It’s probably just a coincidence that the last time he said “This is a great time to buy” on April 9th, Bitcoin was at $76,800. If you listened, you’re probably grinning right now. 😏
But hey, what does Trump know? He’s only the president of the United States or whatever…
Still not convinced?
Cool, let’s walk through this week’s bullish crypto adoption news and see if you’re still on the fence after that. 👇
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Retail to Rulers: Bitcoin's Adoption Ladder
Crypto adoption moves in waves, and guess what?
We’re climbing the ladder fast.
First came the retail degens (you beautiful risk-loving pioneers), then the corporations, followed by the suits in the funds, and now… the governments are showing up.
Yep, things are getting real. 😎🏛️
And this week?
We got hit with a bullish barrage of adoption news:
1) New Hampshire becomes the first U.S. state to go Bitcoin 🏛️
Governor Kelly Ayotte signed HB 302 into law, letting the state invest up to 5% of its $6B treasury into digital assets with a $500B+ market cap. Spoiler: that’s only Bitcoin. That's potentially $300M in BTC. A few days later? Arizona jumps in and announces their Bitcoin treasury policy as well. The dominos are falling.
2) US - UK Trade Deal Announced 🤝
The first since Liberation Day. Whether good or bad, markets crave certainty. And now the world is watching as many more are soon to be announced, but most only care about the specifics of one (cough... China 👀).
3) More Supply Shock Loading 💣
📌 Strive Asset Management merged with Asset Entities (ASST) to form a new U.S.-based Bitcoin treasury company. Goal? Raise $1B to buy Bitcoin and let accredited investors swap stock for BTC, tax-free.
📌 Nakamoto Holdings set to launch with Bitcoin Magazine CEO David Bailey seeking investment to raise $300M and merge with BTC Inc. The name? A nod to Satoshi. The mission? Stack hard.
Adding it up along with the Bitcoin treasury companies announced last week, and you’ve got serious long-term hodlers entering the game.
Translation: more coins off the market, less supply, more squeeze. 📈
But before we throw a full-on bull party, a quick reminder of why Bitcoin exists…
Spain just dropped a financial surveillance nuke 💀
Withdrawing more than €3,000 in cash?
You now have to notify the government, explain why, and wait for approval. Mess around and you could be fined €150K. Hello, first-world dystopia. 🕵️♂️
This is why we stack Bitcoin. Freedom money. Not government-controlled IOUs.
Regardless, the hopium is strong right now:
Headlines shifting bullish ✅
Big adoption announcements piling up ✅
Some scams and hacks? Of course. That’s the cost of playing in the Wild West. 🤠
So yeah, stack smart and take profits
And whatever you do, don’t take the round trip back down!
Let’s ride. 🚀🔥
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Hodl Headlines
The Week’s Most Interesting News
CZ Reportedly Asked Trump for Pardon in Binance Case: Changpeng Zhao, former Binance CEO, allegedly asked Donald Trump for a presidential pardon ahead of sentencing. The revelation adds a political twist to the high-profile crypto legal saga.
Celsius Founder Mashinsky Sentenced to 12 Years for Fraud: Alex Mashinsky, the founder of collapsed crypto lender Celsius, has been sentenced to 12 years in prison for defrauding investors. Prosecutors say he misled users and funneled funds for personal gain.
Ethereum's Pectra Fork Goes Live: The long-awaited Ethereum Pectra upgrade is now live, bringing enhanced scalability and reduced fees. Developers say it marks a major step toward Ethereum’s long-term roadmap.
Florida Drops Strategic Bitcoin Reserve Bills: Florida lawmakers have withdrawn proposals to create a state-held Bitcoin reserve. The reversal follows political pushback and debates over fiscal responsibility.
Epic Games Scores Win in Apple App Store Ruling: A new court ruling grants Epic Games more flexibility in app store payments, weakening Apple’s control. The decision could pave the way for easier crypto integration in mobile gaming.
Coinbase to Acquire Deribit in $2.9 Billion Deal: Coinbase is acquiring Deribit, a leading crypto options exchange, for $2.9 billion. The deal boosts Coinbase’s derivatives presence and solidifies its institutional trading footprint.
Coinbase Posts Strong Q1 2025 Earnings Beat: Coinbase reported better-than-expected Q1 earnings, driven by ETF tailwinds and rising trading volumes. The exchange also raised its full-year outlook amid growing institutional interest.
OCC Greenlights Banks to Handle Custodied Crypto Assets: The Office of the Comptroller of the Currency (OCC) will now allow U.S. banks to manage and interact with customer crypto assets held in custody. The policy shift paves the way for deeper crypto integration in traditional finance.
Meta Exploring Stablecoin Integration for Payouts: Meta is evaluating the use of stablecoins for creator and ad payouts across its platforms. The move could mark a major step in mainstreaming crypto payments to billions of users.
Big thanks for making it to the end of this week’s Hodl Report! 👊
If you enjoyed the ride, had a good laugh or learned a thing or two, feel free to share the love! Just copy/paste this link over to anyone:
The more, the merrier - because who doesn’t love a bigger party? 🥳
Happy Friday!
Disclaimer: The content from Hodl Report should not be taken as trading, investment or financial advice or solicitation to buy or sell any assets. This newsletter is for informational and educational purposes only. Please be careful out there and DYOR (do your own research)