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Hey there, Correction Crusaders!

Welcome to the Hodl Report, where the markets may be crashing, but our jokes are always in the green! 🟢

In this issue:

• Market review - What happened? 📉

• Key news - The week’s must-know headlines. 📰

• Memes - Because everyone needs some laughs this week 😂

It’s a short one this week.

Why?

Because after this market dip, we decided to "touch grass", as they say.

But when we say touching grass, we mean staring at our memecoin losses while seasoning our instant ramen with salty tears. 🍜

The markets pulled back hard this week. Bitcoin dipped, altcoins fell even harder, and the only thing holding steady was the volume of tears from traders everywhere. 😭

So why all the red?

Well, interest rates were indeed cut. It was a measly 0.25% that everyone already saw coming, but hey it’s still the right direction.

Then Fed Chair Jerome Powell decided to spice things up by hinting at higher inflation and fewer rate cuts for 2025.

Imagine someone telling you about bad weather next year and your mood immediately tanks - yeah, it’s like that. 🌩️🤬

The stock market took the hit first, dragging crypto (still too correlated, ugh) down with it. Risk assets went splat, Bitcoin dominance climbed to 58%, and altcoins? Let’s just say Chill Guy is no longer chill.

Not all hope is lost, though! Let’s celebrate the tiny victories:

1. Rates cuts still happened - it’s not much but it’s going in the right direction and we’ll take it, even if Powell has to open his big mouth along with it.

2. MicroStrategy bought more Bitcoin - of course they did. And you can bet your sweet Satoshis that Saylor will be buying more at these prices!
   

   

3. BlackRock is officially team crypto - and this one’s a big deal. See more below. 👇

BlackRock’s Financial Advice

BlackRock - the $9 trillion asset management behemoth - is now playing nice and has fully embraced Bitcoin. You may have seen or read in our past issue that they’re not just whispering, they’re shouting: allocate 1-2% of your assets to BTC.

Let’s do some quick math (we promise, it’s worth it):

• If global wealth (~$900 trillion) takes that advice, Bitcoin could become a $9 - 18 trillion asset class.

• That’s gold-level status, folks. Gold’s market cap is currently sitting around $17.6 billion.

• That puts Bitcoin at a price of $428,500 - 857,000 per coin. 🤯

So yeah, zoom out. The short-term pain is real, but the long-term vision is brighter than a laser-eyed Twitter profile pic.

After all, despite this recent dip, fundamentals haven’t changed. Bitcoin still promises to solve the same problems - like giving the middle finger to inflation, revolutionizing global finance, and making "banking the unbanked" more than just a catchy slogan. It's still here to replace middlemen, empower individuals, and let’s be real, make us dream of Lambos again. 🚀

So, stick with the plan.

In Tuesday’s newsletter, we will dive deeper into the road to a $10T market cap. Until then, hold tight and don’t let Powell steal your vibes. 🌈

One word of caution: Jim Cramer has entered the chat. He just yelled, “Buy the dip!” and, well… history suggests this could mean more pain ahead. Brace yourselves.

When possible, we like to end this weekly wrap and leave you with the sage advice of the legendary, all-knowing, all-seeing, basketball oracle Scottie Pippen…

1. UAE Rumored to Be Accumulating Significant Bitcoin Reserves: Speculations are rife that the United Arab Emirates holds between 300,000 to 400,000 Bitcoins, valued between $3 billion to $4 billion. While unconfirmed, the UAE's recent crypto-friendly policies lend credence to these claims.

2. U.S. Spot Bitcoin ETFs Surpass Gold ETFs in Assets: BlackRock's iShares Bitcoin Trust (IBIT) has surpassed its long-standing iShares Gold Trust (IAU) in net assets, reaching $33.2 billion compared to IAU's $32 billion. This reflects a significant shift in investor preference towards digital assets.

3. Kraken and BitGo to Distribute FTX Payments in 2025: FTX has announced that Kraken and BitGo will assist in distributing recovery funds to users, with the initial repayments expected within 60 days of January 3, 2025. This marks over two years since FTX filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.

4. Deutsche Bank Develops Layer-2 Blockchain on Ethereum: Germany's largest lender, Deutsche Bank, is building a layer-2 blockchain on Ethereum using ZKsync technology to enhance compliance in regulated finance. This initiative aims to improve transaction efficiency and integrate regulatory safeguards directly with Ethereum.

5. Craig Wright Receives Prison Sentence Over Bitcoin Creation Claims: Australian computer scientist Craig Wright, who falsely claimed to be Bitcoin's creator, Satoshi Nakamoto, has been found in contempt of the UK's High Court. He received a 12-month suspended prison sentence for violating a court order prohibiting such claims.

6. Trump-Backed Crypto Venture Partners with Controversial Platform: World Liberty Financial, a crypto venture backed by President-elect Donald Trump, has partnered with Tron, a platform linked to Middle Eastern militant groups. This alliance has raised ethical and legal concerns among experts.

Big thanks for making it to the end of this week’s Hodl Report! 👊

If you enjoyed the ride, had a good laugh or learned a thing or two, feel free to share the love! Just copy/paste this link over to anyone:

HodlReport.com/Subscribe

The more, the merrier - because who doesn’t love a bigger party? 🥳

Happy Friday!

Disclaimer: The content from Hodl Report should not be taken as trading, investment or financial advice or solicitation to buy or sell any assets. This newsletter is for informational and educational purposes only. Please be careful out there and DYOR (do your own research).